Starting in the toddler years, self-centeredness is completely normal and necessary part of development. But as children grow, this can lead to a sense of entitlement and selfish attitudes as they may see themselves as the center of the universe. As parents, we all want our kids to have plenty of confidence and self-esteem. Let’s take a two-year-old having a...[ read more ]
Substance use is considered a “chronic, but treatable condition.” The definition in the dictionary classifies addiction as: “The state of being compulsively committed to a habit or practice or to something that is something that is psychologically or physically habit forming.” Mental health disorders and substance use disorders have some commodities; change in brain structure or stress and trauma. Many...[ read more ]
Mary Oliver’s one repeated question difficult, “What will you do with your one wild and precious life?” This is not a dress rehearsal. After conquering one’s struggle with addictions what is next? It is important to set goals, find meaning and purpose in life. Healing the emptiness that may be left over from years of substance use and lack of...[ read more ]
We can only keep what we have by giving it away. Having a source within the recovery community who is not a close friend or family is the reason many 12 step groups, interventionists, sober companions and treatment centers are so effective. There are so many reasons why having support from another peer in recovery is beneficial. Knowing that there...[ read more ]
Boundaries are loving limits. Boundaries are essential to a healthy relationship. They create a clear limit of what we want, need and expect. There are many types of boundaries, such as creating personal space or sharing personal information. The first step is to realize and establish one’s own limits and boundaries. Creating boundaries can be difficult, however I personally find...[ read more ]
Traumatic events can alter one’s perception of reality, ultimately it affects behavior in negative ways. There is a connection between addiction and alcoholism and trauma. Many people who have experienced some sort of trauma look for outward ways to deal with it. They just want the memories and pain to stop. Each individual reacts and relives trauma in their own...[ read more ]
A family is created with love, hope and dreams. Addiction drives a wedge into all these plans. The home, the place where there should be safety, harmony, and trust are up ended. The acrimony, the constant problems, the never-ending arguments are a nightmare environment created by the constant dysfunctional behavior of the addict. This can turn any family into a...[ read more ]
Failure is not an option for many close relatives. Every family system is different, but they do share some commonalities. Families are intended to love and support each other. The best way for a family to support one of their members is to be present as a united front. They will need to learn skills to best approach their addicted...[ read more ]
There is a fine line between empathy and too much sharing. The relationship between professionals working in the field with clients can be complex. It is not uncommon for a client to be reminded of someone else, and thus transfer those feelings upon the professional. Often, they will be reminded of another authority figure, family member or someone else they...[ read more ]
“It’s not why the addiction, but why the pain,” as Gabor Mate says. Addiction is a normal response to untreated trauma. Not addressing and working on trauma causes people to get stuck in unhealthy thought patterns and negative behavior. Having untreated trauma can cause people to be emotional and have reoccurring dreams or thoughts about the trauma. Reliving the trauma...[ read more ]